Happy Birthday Ryan

We thought of you with love today,
But that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday.
And days before that too.
We think of you in silence.
We often speak your name.
Now all we have is memories.
And your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake.
With which we’ll never part.
God has you in his keeping.
We have you in our heart.

There is so much I wish to say and I think about you every day. I can't see your wave and your smile... We won’t stand on the street and visit for a while… No “how you doing Sis” with a big hug to follow…. No “what are you doing tonight” or “I’ll see ya tomorrow”… All of these things, I cherish so dearly … In my heart, I remember so clearly… I miss your laugh, I miss your smile, neither lost nor forgotten...

I imagine them often and it just doesn’t seem real that you’re not around. I find myself still looking for you when I think or need you… it's been 3 years since the day my loving brother passed and I still talk to you... I know you can hear me… Today I spoke of you and before I finished my sentence…. I could feel your presence, Then a coincidence, or was it a sign? The song that reminds me of you began to play… As If you knew I was thinking of you this day... I smiled.. feeling you were there with me, Again, I sat remembering - Tears filled my eyes as I listened to the song "The Dance" by Garth Brookes. But this time I accepted that you are gone.

Three years later, I know it seems like forever…. I’ve asked myself and I’ve talked to God….. How could he take you away, the only answer that makes any sense is You’re in God’s hands now… As he planned Watching us from above… An Angel in heaven who will always be loved

Tomorrow is Ryan's 32nd birthday which we'll all be in Salt Lake celebrating this day with him at the gravesite. I'll be posting those pictures once I get home...